It’s spring ... glorious spring, finally.
I saw my first robin of the year the other day and the flower bulbs are starting to poke up through the ground. I could wait no longer. This morning I decided to do a little rearranging in my garage.
The first boxes I attacked were marked “Nana’s things.” I couldn’t even remember what was in them. Surprise, they were my mother’s fancy dishes, crystal glassware and lacy table clothes. I had packed all of this when we moved Mom out her home after my Dad passed away. Some of the tablecloths had even belonged to my grandmother.
I thought about the enjoyment we all had at my grandparents’ table. Almost every Sunday we (my sister and two brothers) got dressed up in our good clothes and went to visit Grandma and Grandpa for Sunday dinner. The boys didn’t get too spiffy, but Linda and I always wore our prettiest dresses, and Grandma had a wonderful dinner served on her best plates and one of her fanciest tablecloths.
My cousin, a few years older than I, would be there (unfortunately he passed away last year just four days before his heart bypass surgery was to take place), as was his Mama, my Aunt Helen. She really liked to play poker after dinner and she especially liked “No Peekie.” It was a fun game.
My grandparents were not high society people, but they were salt of the Earth. My grandfather worked as a meat packer for Swift early on and then became a motorman for the city of Chicago streetcar line. He looked so handsome in his uniform and cap. He once gave me a trip on his street car for free. My grandparents were not wealthy people, but they definitely were refined.
It made me think — where has that refinement gone? Do we still serve food in individual dishes or just out of the pots? Do we use napkins or just paper towels? Do we sit down together as a family and eat dinner? How often, once a week or more often? Do we teach our children how to be cultured?
Is anyone refined anymore, or is everything just quick and easy?
When I came in from the garage, I sat down and cried. I have all these lovely things, and who can I give them to? My children will consider them a bother or an inconvenience. I never use a nice linen tablecloth anymore. My table is covered in plastic. It’s convenient, but definitely not elegant.
It upsets me when I go to what I consider to be an expensive restaurant and everyone but me and my guests are there in their torn jeans and T-shirts. Or on a plane — I remember when you just did not fly if you weren’t properly dressed. What if the plane crashed and they found you with dirty underwear?
I know that is stupid. What would you care if you were already dead? No one would be concerned and there would be no message on your tombstone — here lies a person who died in dirty underwear — but it is a sad symptom of our time that so few people care anymore how they look in public.
· JO PLOTZ is a retired accountant, mother of three and grandmother of eight who lives in Ottawa. She can be reached via email at lonnyc@mywebtimes.com.